Weekly Cover: Kalena Johnson's Confidence Comes from Within

At Cal, games start with Kalena Johnson.

The senior defender leads the Bears with 29 draw controls. The task of getting her team momentum from the opening whistle is a tall one. Johnson? She’s not tall, but her confidence far exceeds her 5-2 frame. That confidence comes from within, something built over time and burgeoned by a diagnosis in childhood that sees her standing out in a different way.

Johnson has alopecia universalis, a condition that leaves people without hair anywhere on their bodies. It is a condition that affects less than 1 percent of people worldwide and does not have a cure.

It is also a condition that has never stopped Johnson — not since she and her family first noticed its signs in kindergarten.

“My parents started to notice circular bald patches at the back of my head,” Johnson said. “Within a couple of weeks, it was spreading across my entire scalp. At one point, I lost all my eyebrows, eyelashes and hair on my head and the rest of my body. Some people don’t lose all their hair. They get patches, but I lost all of mine, and it happened fast.”

Naturally, there were doctor appointments. But Johnson perplexed even doctors associated with some of the Bay Area’s top medical institutions.

“I remember doctors not knowing what it was or how to help me,” she said. “At one point, they were like, ‘Oh, you can use this shampoo.’”

The shampoo was meant to stimulate hair growth, but it was painful. Steroid injections were also floated as a potential solution.

“My patches were pretty big, so at that point, [the injections] would have just been preventing anything else from falling out,” Johnson said. “I was so young — was it worth it to undergo it at that point? I’m sure if I was older, I would’ve felt more attached [to my hair].”

Her hair began to return in middle school, only to completely fall out again. Johnson felt she had a handle on the situation, barely knowing anything else. But the hair loss prompted an emotional whiplash that ended with her finding herself.

“It was definitely self-discovery,” Johnson said. “I gained self-confidence as my physical appearance changed. It was about remaining true to myself, whatever my hair was doing.”

Johnson had worn a headband for years, but in sixth grade, with a new sense of self, she made a change.

“At the end of sixth grade, I just, I didn't wear anything — I just rocked it bald,” Johnson said. “I was like, ‘This is who I am,’ and I embraced it.”

That is not to say Johnson never wears something on her head. She wears wigs from time to time (and was wearing one when she met her coach at Cal, Jennifer Wong, in person on picture day, causing them to do a double take). But it’s a way for her to play with her style, as many do with their hair.

“Rocking it bald” was, of course, a risk. Kids can be cruel. Johnson’s parents had sent letters to the school explaining her diagnosis since she received it, which helped with the education piece and for her to stave off questions. However, bullying and comments can take on a new edge as kids enter the tween years. Johnson feels fortunate that she didn’t have that experience.

“Kids can be mean, but sometimes, kids don’t care that much,” Johnson said. “Looks start to matter more at some point, but we were still pretty young, and my parents did a good job educating everyone as much as possible.”

Sports were a haven for Johnson — first soccer, then lacrosse in middle school. On the field, her height was what opponents focused on most.

“When you see her, you don't immediately think, ‘She must be a great athlete,’” her father, Danny Johnson, said. “She’s on the smaller side and bald on top of it, so she looks different.”

Johnson played differently, too, earning the MVP award three times at the Denver Shootout and scoring an invitation to USA Lacrosse’s National Team Development Program U17 Girls’ Combine. Her differences were her superpowers.

“It instilled grittiness,” Johnson said. “People weren’t necessarily underestimating me but were like, ‘Oh, she’s small. You don’t have to worry about her.’ I learned what that meant for me and how I was going to use those things to fuel and empower me.”

It fueled and empowered her to continue pursuing sports at the collegiate level and become open to hearing questions — the questions her parents tried to answer with letters at the start of the school year. The questions Johnson said people understandably have.

“It’s taught me that sometimes people just don't know,” she said. “It’s not that people are trying to be mean. Sometimes, people are just curious because they haven’t been exposed to it.”

It is not Johnson's job — or anyone who is different — to educate or explain themselves. Sometimes, and for some, living with a condition that makes them visibly or invisibly different is exhausting enough before factoring in the need to answer the same questions. But Johnson saw the questions as an opportunity and a lesson for others and herself.

“It’s allowed me to embrace people for the qualities that make them unique from such an early age,” she said. “I can help someone somewhere else, even if it’s not directly, by teaching people.”

Dad’s learning, too.

“The resilience she showed — the grit, you know, the empathy,” Danny Johnson said. “Even when I say things as a dad, she’s like, ‘Dad, I’m good.’ Her character is remarkable.”

His daughter would need to lean into that character as she transitioned from high school to college, where the questions that were “asked and answered” popped up again on a large campus.

“In high school, everyone knew me,” she said. “It was definitely a challenge getting here and being like, ‘Do I talk about it?’”

Johnson decided the answer was yes.

“I’m always trying to go into it with a sense of confidence,” she said. “This is who I am, and I want to try to be as open as possible, even if it’s on my Instagram.”

When Wong took over at Cal during Johnson’s sophomore year, confidence was the first thing that stood out (right after the double-take of Johnson in a wig confirmed it was, in fact, the defender who made the most starts of any freshman on the team the year before).

“Her confidence, regardless of hair or no hair, is unmatched,” Wong said. “In some ways, her going through everything she’s gone through is why she is so confident in who she is.”

The line about her unmatched confidence isn’t hyperbole. Wong had the team take a DISC assessment — a questionnaire-style test focused on scoring people for dominance, influence, steadiness and conscientiousness. The goal is to help people understand their personalities and communication styles better. Once again, Johnson stood out.

“The first time we took it, I talked to our mental performance coach, who was like, ‘I can't wait to meet this person because she has one of the most interesting profiles I've ever seen,’” Wong said. “She scored very high in dominance. That’s someone who is assertive, asks for what she needs and takes control of the situation. But she also scored high in influence, which scores how someone works with others. That’s the empathy part. So she’s always been one of those players who is a mix of a lot of different qualities. She’s complex, and she understands situations.”

It’s made Johnson an ear for other women with alopecia. A friend recently texted her that another friend had been diagnosed. “Can I send her your number?” the friend asked.

“I’m like, ‘Of course. I wish I knew someone like that when I was growing up,” she said.

And that’s the big part of her evolution — and why she’s speaking out. Johnson looked within to find her confidence without a female role model. She remembered finding some inspiration in former professional basketball player Charlie Villanueva, who also has alopecia universalis. But if we’re being honest? It’s generally different with girls.

“There's not a lot of female athletes that go out there and rock it bald,” Danny Johnson said. “I'm sure there are others that have alopecia, but there's not a lot of others that go out there bald and just play. She’s embracing that more — the chance to help people with alopecia.”

Cal’s move to the ACC from the Pac-12 puts games on the ESPN family of networks and pits the Bears against some of the sport’s blue bloods. It gives Johnson a larger platform to inspire and educate in her final season. And she’s not taking it for granted.

“Even being on a TV can help some little boy or girl going through alopecia — or not,” Johnson said. “They may be like, ‘Oh, why doesn’t she have hair?’ And they can learn. That in and of itself is so cool. If that is something that this new conference gives us the ability to do, then I am super excited and grateful.”

Ever the gritty underdog, Johnson is also rolling up to matchups with top-20 teams with plenty of banners hanging with another goal in mind: To win.

“We have this incredible opportunity to go into a new conference and redefine what success looks like,” Johnson said. “We can embrace the underdog mentality and rewrite our story in a way we want to.”

Don’t underestimate Johnson. She certainly doesn’t underestimate herself.