This story initially appeared on Behind the Whistle, the official blog of the IWLCA, and is being republished with permission from the organization. Amanda Magee is the head coach at Benedictine College.
From one small town to another, my life as a coach has taken me from New Jersey to Rhode Island and now beautiful (and tiny) Atchison, Kansas. If someone had told me five years ago I would be given the opportunity to start a woman’s lacrosse program halfway across the country, I would have laughed in their face! Thankfully, that blessing did come my way, and I am here to share the top five lessons I’ve learned about life and starting a program in the Midwest.
My name is Amanda Magee, and I am from a big, loud Irish-Italian family from New Jersey. Growing up in my house, Sunday sauce with spaghetti and meatballs was staple, and my mother always cooked for fifteen people because you never knew when someone was going to stop by. As the middle child of four siblings, one boy and three girls, I always had a support system and cheering squad, and our parents always said, 'Once you’re in the circle of trust, you’re in for life.' My father was my first coach and instilled in me a love of competition. He always encouraged us to do our best, and I credit him with helping me make the decision to move to Kansas (thanks for driving the U-Haul from Rhode Island, Dad!) and this first lesson:
1. Get out of your comfort zone!
You know that saying, “Life begins at the end of your comfort zone?” Well, it’s the truth!
Was it uncomfortable moving to a place where I didn’t know anyone and I was 1,600 miles from my family? Yes.
Was I terrified to make mistakes at my first head coaching job? Yes.
But I did it anyway because I knew it could be my only shot at achieving my life-long dream of making a career out of lacrosse. Moving to Kansas and starting a program at an NAIA school was a major challenge. There were days when my emotions ranged from excitement to despair to confusion, all in a two-hour practice time slot some days. When I look back at my moments of discomfort, I now see the growth. Growth in myself, as my confidence grew in my coaching abilities, and growth in my players, as they saw what fighting through adversity and challenges felt like. Taking the risk and moving to Kansas and being open to that growth paid off, and we have started to build a tradition of success.
2. If you’re gonna be a bear, be a grizzly!
Now, I can’t take credit for this one. My first goalie coach in high school, Jesse Schmidt, gets all the credit, but it is some of the best advice I ever received. I think when you give something your all, there is nothing to regret.
Your failures can be your best lessons. I look back on those early years and some of our practice plans and think, “What was I doing?” But right or wrong, I was all in. And most importantly, the team was all in. They believed we could achieve greatness. They believed that if we gave everything we had at practice, film and lifting sessions and got a little bit better every day, at the end of the season it would be a success and the wins would follow. And luckily (or with a ton of hard work and consistency) they did. We finished No. 2 in the NAIA after the 2019 season and continue to fight for our goal and dream of winning a national championship.