This story initially appeared on Behind the Whistle, the official blog of the IWLCA, and is being republished with permission from the organization. Taylor Woolard is the head coach at Converse University.

As I was sitting in the Texas airport getting ready to head back home to South Carolina after the IWLCA Presidents Cup tournament, Betsy Butterick’s keynote session from the IWLCA Convention and Thuy Williams’ session from the Coaches Clinic, “The Why of What You Do,” were replaying in my head. Both sessions really made me start to think about what things I make an intentional effort to say at practices, games or in everyday life and the things I just assume my players know.

On any given day, it feels like there are so many things that coaches must worry about before, during and after games or practices that at times it is hard to take a moment to enjoy and appreciate the small things when they do happen. And I thought to myself, “I wonder if all the players I have coached over the years realize just how much that they have impacted my why and who I am as a coach?” So, I began writing you all this letter. I know you all may not see this, but I didn’t want to miss an opportunity to say this to you right now.

If you take or took anything from your time with me as your coach, I hope you always remember this: BE ALL IN. Whatever you do, do it 100 percent, even on the hard days. Invest in yourself, believe in what you are doing and the young woman you are becoming, and at all costs,  always leave somewhere or something better than when you found it. 

I should start by saying THANK YOU to the high school girls who made me a coach and helped me find my love for this profession. At a time when I wasn’t sure what to do without “athlete” being part of my identity, you reminded me of the young girl who loved lacrosse and made me want to be the mentor and coach that I had when I was growing up. When I pushed you out of your comfort zones to see more in yourselves, you all answered. You trusted me when I saw something in you that you hadn’t yet seen. Thank you for allowing me to be a part of your lives.

To my college players who met me at the beginning of this crazy dream, and to the ones I have right now, thank you for joining in. I know when we met, we were both just starting out ... learning who we were, what changes life can throw at us and who we wanted to be. And yet, you all embraced me at every step. You bought in. You invested in yourselves and the kind of lacrosse player and young adult you wanted to become. You never quit on me. For that, I can’t thank you enough. 

The title “Coach” comes with an understanding that I will teach you and help you learn from and fix your mistakes. What you don’t realize is how much I have learned from you all. It is no secret I have faced many bumps, dark roads and trials throughout my short life, and I like to think that I am all the better and stronger because of it — but what I have learned from coaching you all has forever changed my heart.

I have sat with some of you as you were being told loved ones have passed, been the call after a scary accident, when your heart was broken, or held your hand when you got the news of a season-ending injury — and yet, your responses to these things never ceased to amaze me. The way you embraced your teammates and stepped on the field the very next day as if nothing happened. The way you all continued to fight when most would have looked at the fight like it was already over. The strength you all have given me, shown me and taught me is remarkable, to say the least. You all have taught me what it means to love and to fight relentlessly when all else fails. All are things that you cannot see or count on a scoreboard. 

I hope you all know that while I love lacrosse and winning, I have loved being your coach more. All the silly moments, pictures and videos — laughing until you cry during road trips — the random calls from past players checking in and current players just letting me know how their day is going. Watching you all nail a skill we have been working on in practice or your reaction after you scored your first goal in your collegiate career to seeing you walk into the office excited to show off the grade you got on your test that you spent hours studying for. That is WHY I love what I do. Because of you all. When I feel like I have no idea what I am doing, you all believe in me. On my worst days, when life seems to be a little too heavy, you all met/meet me with open arms and overflow my cup with love. When I was supposed to be the strong one, you all reminded me of how strong I can really be. No matter the day, the situation or how frustrated you all may have made me at practice, every little note that you left me or wrote me that day I still have it. I will always treasure those little things. 

When you look back at our time together, I hope you know and have always felt that it was more than the goals you scored or the drives you stopped. It was about everything in between. I hope you don’t see stats or how many goals you scored when you look in the mirror. See yourself ... a person that I hope after all these years together knows how much I loved my time with you, how you made my life better and how you impacted me to be the coach that I am today. If your cup ever feels a little empty, I hope you know that I am always here to fill it up. You changed my life. I hope you know that I think of you all often and pray that life is good to you. I love seeing all your happy posts and celebrating you. I am so proud of you all. And if you ever wonder if you left something better than you found it, I can promise you that you did. I will forever be better because I got to coach you ... because I got the chance to know you. 

So, THANK YOU for being a blessing in my life and the impact that you had on me exactly when I didn’t know I needed it. No matter where you are in life today or if you are still playing for me, please continue to be the best, most fierce and fearless version of yourself. Don’t water yourself down for anyone or anything, and remember you have a purpose in this crazy life. When life gets a little too heavy, remember how strong you are and have always been. Believe in you. And at all costs, always leave somewhere or something better than you found it. 

Love always,
Coach T